Fun Zoo The Max

Sure, the zoo is enjoyable, but what would make it more fun?

More fun would! Add more fun!

How? This;

Try to line the cage bars up with a zebra's stripes so it looks like it's just a brown horse.

Bring an animal to the zoo with you and try to sneak it in to an enclosure. But be careful to add it to one that suits it; cats in with the lions, hamsters in with meerkats, dogs get to go in with wolves, goldfish with... they just go in water, in any water. This way they'll all have things to talk about.

Elephants. Dress as a peanut. Then flee, Pamploma style.

Find a leopard and talk to it. They don't care about what. They just love talking. 

Take some compact discs and try to throw them onto the horn of a rhino. Also, get the rhino a CD player so it can enjoy some sweet tunes. Remeber, don't give them any classical music, they are shallow beasts who prefer RnB.

Things Robots Are Scared Of.

1. Ghosts
2. Oxidation
3. Robocop
4. Some chimps
5. Magnets
6. Electro-Magnets
7. Intimacy
8. The Inquisition 
9. Commitment
10. Intimate-Magnets

Proverbs

A few weeks ago, I posted some proverbs on my twitter account @misterspidergod. Some of them are collected here. Why? Two reasons, Twitter is an awful archiving tool and more importantly, I am lazy.

• There's more than one way to skin a cat. There are six; original, western, double original, diet, buffalo-fireball and alpine.

• Too many cooks spoil the broth. Because, generally, cooks are dicks.

• A picture is worth a thousand milli-pictures.

• The proof is in the pudding. So if you're a detective, check out the pudding.

• It takes a thief to catch a thief, it will take a third thief to catch the first one, eventually you'll have to swallow a spider.

• Lightning never strikes the same place twice more than once.

• A trouble shared is a trouble doubled.

• An army marches on its stomach. An army of snakes.

• A bird in the hand will freak the fuck out.

That's all for now, I'm sure I'll revive this tired trope soon.